Friday, December 31, 2004
star
You think you know just how to read him
And then he throws you right off track
And all you know is how much you need him
Time will tell you where his heart is really at
You wish...Every time a star falls from the sky
You wish...That he'd feel the way you feel inside
You hope and you pray, keep it all locked away
As you see yourself lost in his kiss...You wish
yup.i'm wishing to get over it soon. but it wouldn't hurt if he felt the same
twisted taste: maltesers
Mood music:second star to the right-jesse mccartney
*shy that way
Thursday, December 30, 2004
chronicles
this would probably be a very sad thing for the people who start school on monday.. the new year's coming! haha, i only start school in feb so yup, i get to stay home and do nothing but worry about getting lost in melb. oh wells, i've gotta do what i've gotta do.
i've finally realized that the wabbit isn't perfect, and that placing people on pedestal isn't good. but then again, i've explained what limerence is. the initial state of thinking someone is perfect. so yeah, i think we all do that., you know, think someone is perfect and all. anywho, it's good that i'm moving on right?
we come into this world and we are all the same, and in that moment there's no one to blame. but we're living in this world, getting colder everyday.
i always thought that it's really a little stupid to be fighting amongst races. i mean, we're all the same race right, the human race and instead of helping one another, we're kinda just helping each other get extinct faster. that's pretty mjuch stupid. maybe that's why despite the tragedy of the tsunamis and all, it's heart-warming seeing everyone come together to help each other out.
i wasn't on a mountain, when this came to me, all my life's been wasted, chasing shallow dreams.
twisted taste: scrambled eggs
Mood music:the chronicles of life and death- good charlotte
*shy that way
Wednesday, December 29, 2004
msia
went to do my ic today, totally impressed by how fast the malaysian immigration people are! seriously, not being sarcastic and mean as usual. anyway, with THAT done, i now can focus on being a lazy bum again. ate alot today and when i say alot, its alot. had curry puffs, nasi lemak, apong balik( i cant spell it, basing it on my english phonics) and claypot rice. this included dinner,lunch and brekkie. oh wells, its alot for me, because firstly, theyre all the food im not allowed to eat, esp the curry puff's puff and the apong balik's everything. whats done is done..but it tastes mighty swell.
my mouth isn't so swollen now meaning i guess theres less pus innit. haha, too much information again. it HAS to get better, i cannot go to the new yr's dinner looking like an abomination, just doesnt do me ANY good. i hope they're cute people at the dinner. hah! seriously doubt it, bet they're all old and graying.oh except for my family and extended family and us, meaning my sisters and cousins. oh darnnit.
feeling crappily fat today, and bloated. must be the overdose of water! but i'm dead thirsty and i can't stop drinking the water. curses. slept alot today, woke up at 7 plus to go get my ic thing done and slept from 3 til 6.30. lol, look who's gonna be tossing and turning tonight! serves me right.
i think i'm finally getting over the limerence stage of liking him. which is bravo.yay!!! phew, i don't like liking people who don't like me back. it pisses me off tons and makes me sad!
aiight. i'm going iceskating tomorrow lets pray the luck stays and i dont fall and embarrass myself.
oh and i finally found a friend who's leo and is a guy. how awesome is that.you learn something new everyday.
How can I put it, you put me on
I even fell for that stupid love song
Yeah, yeah, since you been gone
How come I'd never hear you say
I just wanna be with you
Guess you never felt that way
twisted taste: water!
Mood music: unsweet sixteen-wakefield
*shy that way
lala
i can bowl allright. hahaah, it's funny because din's friend, herbin, was trying to beat me haha but we ended up having a tie so yup! the loser was suppose to treat the others to fries but there was technically no loser so yup. and it was real awesomeeee hanging out with nise, the twins and their besties.hahaha real good fun. wheee! like i was a little kid again, totally totally stress-free, except for that pain of a stomachache that tried to ruin my afternoon but after drinking some warm water, courtesy of the grumpy woman at the counter, it got all better. wheeee.
before the whole bowling & pool playing, i was at nise's place and we filled up the polkadot book with nonsense and babble and liesah helped me figure out how to use the silly mouse on the laptop so i could do up the bestie cd thingy. i LOVE ALL THE SONGS IN THE CD! theres LFO and bowling for soup... and so many more.its super fun and i lovelovelove the cd to bits. *squeals* today was totally great..except for the rain. it made all of us SOAKING WET as we trudged all the way to the mrt station. my jeans were soaked and so were my pooor pretty nikes! but anywho, a little rain couldnt spoil the fun, and the little headache couldnt make it too terrible either. i'm writing about today in a very jumbled up manner and i think my sleeepiness is affecting it, mucho sorry. but you roughly can pick up the bits and pieces of how my great day went.
oh, and i nearly got killed by a car and a bus on my way home.lol. i got so effing mad because the bus was right in the middle on the road when it was the green man for me to cross so i just crossed right, then it suddenly turned RED and like every vehicle was moving so luckily, the car decided to lemme cross and so did the bus (not that they could actually go, because the whole of orchard road was in its usually jammed up mess) . and theres something very important i must say, I HAVE A NEW FAVOURITE SONG. it's called david. written by me and nise. hah! you oughta ch-ch-check it out.its really brill.hehe
i love niiiseeeeeee & all the great people in my life!
on the other hand, I AM HOPPING MAD AT MY STUPID COUSIN. she's like trying to be my clone, copy this and copy that.like h-hello? get a life, stop stealing mine! i like pink, you've just GOTTA love it, i like this you just got to as well, i speak like this, hell you might as well follow and i act like this, why not do it too? oh wait... i hate you like this, DO YOU? effing biatch, do you have any idea how annoying it is? sue me for being mean and rude but flattery is good, cloning is just plain pathetic.
twisted taste: watermelon
Mood music:la la by ashlee simpson
*shy that way
Monday, December 27, 2004
woxy
hello world.
went to the dentist again, its gross, lets NOT talk about it. haha met nisa and realized that FOR THE FIRST TIME in histoire, im late. now lemme hear you say yay. oh well, we laughed about stupid things like wappers and woxy.and bunny wabbits. oh and realized that you cant be a chigga if you cant wap! i know, we so dont make sense.
oh well, roamed around looking for a christmas sock for sox but knowing all the kiasu people around, they decided 'oh lets clear out christmas stuff since it's over' and so, we couldnt find any sock. poor little sox, i think he's depressed. oh well, havenmt people realized christmas technically lasts for like, 12 days.. and hence the song.but SHOULDNT THEY KEEP THE SPIRIT AROUND A LITTLE LONGER? stupid.
everyone's feeling a bit itchy, especially me.
Twisted taste: nothing
Mood music: nothing
*shy that way
Sunday, December 26, 2004
la la la
la la la...merry christmas
i hate you
tell me over and over and over again.
twisted taste: nothing
Mood music: memory by sugar cult
*shy that way
Saturday, December 25, 2004
noise from the basement
nise has an uncle bird, and i have an uncle mimi. i think uncles have funny names...seriously.oh well, christmas is hereeeeeeee. it's a tad fast but im not complaining. the only ones who probably are , would be all the people who have to work on monday and all the students who soon have to go back to school. poor them, i've got an extra month but i've got to brush up on my cooking during then. i so hate the heat.
baked sugar cookies again and i daresay these are no fail sugar cookies. i tried piping the word christmas and it was super cute, til i broke it when it was done baking. so funnily, it broke into 5 pieces so we each (in the family) got a piece.yupyup.and i have this weird craving for COKE! yummmmy coke. fizzzy coke. thirst quenching coke.
my sisters are going mad over LOTR. i don't even know what the story's about.all i hear is 'wowwwww'. hehe. funny sisters
twisted taste: coke!
Mood music: boys by britney
*shy that way
Friday, December 24, 2004
funtimes
i'm excited about life, i know it sounds like im squealing happy. i probably am, this song never fails to make me cheeer up.
went out today again and took great photos with nisa.hahaa, we should so stick them all in the polkadot book. i love those photos we take and theyre all really funny and it's like, you get to be yourself and do stupid things. like when we were in the bikini store. it was so funny being just silly and talking about nonsense. and it didnt hurt that the guy at the store was super cute and really nice. oh and i was showing nisa this cute guy at another store too. i think all the cute guys have become sales people but it sucks because i get so nervous arnd them so i never really buy anything. nisa thinks i have a serious problem.
i had a great time today and it was tiring but im really contented. and i have a magic conch (is that how i spell it?) i love all my friends. lovelovelove you guys.and although i get my little cat fights with some, they must've played some part in my life, be it making me a more patient person or a better person. or just learning that bitching isn't always a good thing. sometimes the best kind of torture is to smile at your enemy and make them feel twisted and guilty. i like. hehe
twisted taste: passion fruit juice
Mood music: i cant wait by hilary duff
i dont want my love to go to waste
i want you and your beautiful soul.
*shy that way
Wednesday, December 22, 2004
till then
went shopping today, and that qualifies as my second favourite thing. first would be cooking! met up with trish today and it was a blast.as usual. we laughed tons and alked alot, possibly a routine for us. We took photostickers! and it was so funny because everything was in chinese but we were still struggling and the irony of it all was that we realized we didnt have as much trouble with those japanese machines which we understood nothing at all.
both of us chatted about school and our would-be friends and all the things we could do and accomplish in melb. I guess she's the only one i can talk to about stuff like that since she's the only one im close to who's going. i miss nisa already.
anyway, saw more clothes i just HAD to get but didnt. a potential top is on its way to my home now, my mom's out buying it. hehe. i love mambo, all the quirky stuff.
whisper in my ear baby, words i want to hear.
twisted taste: sugar cookies
Mood music: that's all by michael buble
*shy that way
christmas draws near
okay so i want my cake and eat it too, and its a bad thing because im greedy and this only leaves me with one thing-disappointment. lets just pray i'll learn soon enough.
going out today so no more lazing around. Technically i havent been lazing that much because i was in bangkok so that whole lot of walking must have done me SOME good somewhere. ahaha.
the christmas tree looks fab but its whats under it that doesnt. the presents look so stingy. i think my mom should start wrapping all the presents so we can fill up the bottom of the tree then make it SEEM as if theyre all ours. haha, when they really not.
i want to eat turkey & breadandbutter pudding now.
yumyum
twisted taste: toothpaste
Mood music: baby it's cold outside
*shy that way
Tuesday, December 21, 2004
bacck
im back from bangkok and it was fun. i know i dont sound too hyped up about it but thats just coz im tired. maybe i should call nisa and see hows she's doing. oh well, i'll summarize the trip for you ok?
eat.shop.eat.shop.sleep.
haha, i know, what fun! i bought buncha stuff and ate tons of food. I love thai food now, except tomyum soup and that spicy fishcake thingy. and probably the fried bugs.lawrence and marcus had grasshoppers and stuff like that. alistair stole some other type of bug haah but im not that crazy. not THAT crazy. cds there a like $15 bucks and for once when you say 1000baht, it doesnt feel painful. well, it's still lke $40-50 bucks sg dollars but it's not like a thousand bucks. you get what i mean? hahaha, nevermind, it's the fatigue-ness talking. and, i found out my dad can speak a tad bit of thai. how fun, so we left most of the bargaining up to him.hehe.=)
thailand is great!
twisted taste: beef balls soup with glass noodles
Mood music: nothing
*shy that way
Friday, December 17, 2004
results
i hate packing, because it means i have to be organized which obviously and
unfortunately, isnt me. but since my mom would never check my luggage, i can just chuck it all inside and pray it turns out fine when i reach.
i have a sleeping problem and it's a pain. complete complete pain. who the hell sleeps at 3 and wakes up at 9?
why cant it just snow.
do you know, that if you live 13 storeys up, the wind gets really scary,esp when it bangs against your window and makes a sound as if its a ghost trying to kill you.
just a thought
oh, and i have finally found someone that agreees that that's all by michael buble is the perfect song. like if it were a dessert, lets say chocolate cake, it'd be decadent with the light sponge and the slightly bittersweet ganache and maybe even a hint of orange tang. perfect harmony.
just a thought.
twisted taste: gyoza (it's really early to be eating it tho)
Mood music: bonnie & cylde by beyonce and jay z
*shy that way
Thursday, December 16, 2004
curses
coz i need you
and i miss you
and now i wonder
if i could fall into the sky
do you think time would pass me by
coz you know id walk a thousand miles
if i could just see you tonight
it's not fair..how can the one person i feel is right, NOT be the right person? this is mind-boggling. dammit, just like me back.
twisted taste: gummybears
Mood music:a thousand miles by vanessa carlton
*shy that way
where are you now
AH! i think any girl who can dance in high heels should be given the props! I SWEAR..they can kill. oh well, at ;east i now have a sense of achievement hehe so it's not all bad.
I GOT MY PANTS! the ones i wanted really badly from mambo and i think nise's my lucky clothes star because everytime we hangout i always seeem to find something. seriously. like that white ribbon top and the red dinner top. hahaha, we should hangout more nise!=) *grin*
going off tomorrow, like finally, a holiday! and then when i come back, it'd be christmas! well, technically it wont be, at least not for a few days, but the christmas mood would have kicked in FULL SWING by then.
where are you now, i'm trying to get by with never knowing at all
what is the chance of finding you out there
or do i have to wait forever?
I've seen a million different places
But through the crowds and all the faces
I'm still out there looking for you.
twisted taste: waffles with peanut butter
Mood music: you're just too good to be true
*shy that way
Saturday, December 11, 2004
downhill
and it's all downhill from here...
i feel like a deflated balloon.
twisted taste: nothing
Mood music: nothing
*shy that way
Thursday, December 09, 2004
crimson chin
haha, i feel like the damn crimson chin from the fairly oddparents.hahaha i also feel like professor Utonium from the powerpuff girls too. what do they have in common? A SQUARE JAW! *cries* the swelling still isn't down yet so i'm still left looking like a lop-sided dummy. this is so not my day. oh wells, til i look normal again, toodles!
twisted taste: currry
Mood music: nothing
*shy that way
w.e
blasted! bloodybloodybloody.
*goes mad and hops around*
to you: WAS I SUPPOSE TO GODDAMMIT CARE? you just want sympathy, YOU ALWAYS DO!
to another you: GOD! i'm trying so hard, but it's just never going to be freaking good enough is it? NOT THAT YOU'LL EVER KNOW COZ YOU DONT SEE IT!
to another you: STOP ANNOYING ME.
just stop.
In friendship, people make an effort to do things right, to be there but how come i can never trust you, rely on you? I MAKE AS MUCH EFFORT AS THE NEXT PERSON DOES and i do my best but all i ever get is disappointment time and time again. YOU KNOW WHAT! everytime i try, everytime i tell myself its not your fault, IT ENDS UP BEING YOUR GODDAMN FAULT. i'm tired but i never gave up, im freaking pissed but i wont give up. I don't do things like that because i trust in you.
but lately, it feels wasted, just wasted
why don't you think about it before you start yelling about life being a craphole, think about what i'm actually saying. this isn't a bitchfight because if it was, i'd email this to you right away. this is my call for help, for you to see why i never come to you sometimes, why i'd rather cry and be alone than to come to you because the tables always turn, and it ends up being about you.
you could be so much more, i could be so much more. if only we allowed ourselves to. i'll miss you even if you don't but hey, lifes like that. omg my life's so unfair. hehe.
sounds familiar?
twisted taste: nothing
Mood music: nothing
*shy that way
Wednesday, December 08, 2004
christmas!
heys! i'm really excited that dajie's coming home tomorrow! hahha, as my dad says, there will never be peace until she leaves again.hahaha. when the three of us (me, nic & dajie) are together it's jsut pure havoc i swear, we have a problem with shutting up. so anyways, this time she goes back, i'll be with her and i'll prolly bawl my eyes out when i leave. i mean, i'll miss everything here, even the irritating heat. oh wells, life goes on and i've gotta learn!
my mouth is swollen now, and theres a bump on the left side. It's not veryvery terrible, but terrible nonetheless and i refuse to go out until it has gone down. I have to make pineapple tarts again and probably sugar cookies too. sugar cookies for christmas and to get into that whole YIPPEEE mood. i love christmas. i always tell my mom that it seems really christmasy when we go shopping at night and it's raining. god, you cant beat that! hehe.=)
anyway..i'm going to go now to indulge in all the happiness christmas brings. i love my christmas tree! i decorated it this year, and i themed it red & gold. so so classic and pretty. plus since my sofa downstairs has a gold-ish color and red and green (trust me, it doesnt look as tacky as im painting it out to be), it looks even more christmasy! and the faux fireplace.ahhh.. i just need some christmas stocking and i'm all set!
oh yeah, and a gold star for the top of the tree.
twisted taste: mashed potatoes
Mood music: another day in paradise-brandy
*shy that way
Tuesday, December 07, 2004
insecure
i feel so terribly insecure right now. dont know why, dont know how nbut it feels as if what i own in my closet isn't cool enough and what i eat isnt healthy enough. you know all that bullshit that i go through from time to time? well today's one of those days and after i just downed like 3 scoops of icecream, i BET that's gonna make me feel even BETTER-not! geez.
twisted taste: icecream
Mood music: nothing
my insecurities could eat me alive-eminem
*shy that way
ouch
I JUST WENT THROUGH SURGERY.and i dont like it one bit,hahaah i had to get my wisdom tooth removed, which means, the dentist had to cut through my gum and the slice my tooth into two to get it out. and there were chances of the nerve which was really close to the tooth being damaged, rendering me having no senses at the left side of my mouth for a few months. that basically makes me paralysed.BUT! me, being the lucky me, was lucky to not have to go through that. also, the dentist being supersuper brill, saved me! yayayy!
oh well, there's always a first. i was so scared i was shivering. luckily there were headphones for me to listen to music. there was this caller who called in and had to sing to one of kylie's songs and haha, i wanted to laugh so bad but i couldnt. hehehe..that-was painful.heheeh oh wells, it was allright coz i trusted the dentist. he's really nice. so one more point for bravery. oh actually, i think i deserve two points. you think?
twisted taste: NOTHING
Mood music: car wash by christina & missy
*shy that way
Monday, December 06, 2004
big smiles
hehe, i'm happy just because.
i will not let my parent's constant dronings of me being useless affect me, just not now.
twisted taste: sugar cookies
Mood music: predictable by good charlotte
*shy that way
i am bored. BORED i tell you. i might just die of boredom but what am i complaining about.i'd rather be bored stiff than be doing maths or some silly essay so yea i'm happy.=). oh well, baked sugar cookies and theyre super yum. first time any cookie i baked turned out better than some yucky tasting thing. No taste of that home-made thing... if you get what i mean because i HATE that taste, instant turn off. Nic's still sick, like really sick. poor her, i hope she's well soon enough.
i might just go watch the incredibles, in the wonderful company of myself.hehe, i don't feel like being sociable and besides, i like being alone sometimes. And, somehow it's a confidence booster.hehe, i know, its such nonsense. then again, usually the best things in life don't make sense.
caine's being a little loco. hmm
oh wells. toodles!
twisted taste: sugar cookies
Mood music:what i like about you by lillix
what i like about you
is tht you know how to dance.
shake it! hehe
*shy that way
Sunday, December 05, 2004
malaria
okay, this is getting quite freaky. Nic might have dengue fever or malaria. My mom suspects it could be malaria but i just hope its a case of BAD fever and nothing else. I don't think i can cope with sick people. They get all gloomy and unhappy-which makes me unhappy and gloomy. and then where would all the laughter go to! oh well, i pray she's fine, i mean, it could jsut be a case of self-sadness and that's why its taking longer for her to get well. could be=)
anyway! the christmas tree is up and running! (technically) i haven't put the lights on yet or the star. the star broke (haha) so we've got to buy a new one. hopefully one less plastique and more chic. hey! they have GREAT christmas decorations at paragon that are CHIC so yeah=). i'll prolly go there with my mom someday before christmas. hehe. im all set to make some pretty sugar cookies with colorful icing. Maybe give them as christmas presents sicne im currently broke because i havent gotten a single cent of pocket money eversince the day school ended somewhere in.. october. that's a long time to be penniless if you get what i mean but i guess if i rummage through my handbags long enough, i could find some hidden cash. you never knowww=)
so yeah, til then! see yous!
twisted taste: meatball!
Mood music: what's a girl to do by S2S
whats a girl to do
with a boy like you
*shy that way
Saturday, December 04, 2004
insane psycos
eeeew. i swear, there are a buncha sicccck people in this world. Lets see, in friendster, half the men are SO FREAKING OLD and yet they want to be your 'friend' like hello? if you wanna prey on some young innocent ass, go find someone else. it's not like i'd ever be interested in you right? you big fat dickhead ass. oh god, i wanna kick you sooo hard and send to some crackwhore's house. i am SO dammit annoyed. i have three words for you. LEAVE ME ALONE. i bet you're an old man who's got one testical and has a crater-face. With all your acne scars and oil ooozing out from your disfigured complexion and you're prolly scrawny and fair,with big size 15 feet and knobby knees. oooh, you just annoy the hell out of me.
twisted taste: watchamcalit (peanut butter chocolate) by Hersheys
Mood music:my reply by christina aguilera
You're Slim Shady, yes you're the real Shady.
You sound like Peter Brady.
You get quite irritating.
So won't the real Slim Shady please shut up,
please shut up, please shut up
haha, i still love you eminem!
How many heartaches must I stand
Before I find the love to let me live again
Right now the only thing that keeps me hanging on when I feel my strength,
ooh, it's almost gone
I remember mama said
You can't hurry love
No you'll just have to wait
She said love don't come easy
ooh! love this song!
*shy that way
Friday, December 03, 2004
retail theraphy
i spent money shopping and i love shopping and i think i shall immerse myself in unstoppable shopping.HAHA. right, lets just pray my money tree grows again. oh wells, got my 'uniform' for school next yr which primarily consists of JEANS and SHIRTS. yay. i love papa roach, very nice music and i like finch too. god, what has happened to my stupid bubblegum pop self.
love finds you when you're busy planning something else
twisted taste: egg tart
Mood music:letters to you by finch
*shy that way
Thursday, December 02, 2004
same direction
I am so thanking my lil cousin for SAVING ME! and hehe, giving me this awesome site for downloading free music. It's not the best but hey, i doubt there's spyware and all that stuff that plays around with your computer's brain and then finally frizzes it out! hehe, so yeah.
I am still going round and round drowning in my own indecisiveness. But it's not like it's my fault. i reaaaally like him but i mean, i dont even think he wants to even bother to be my friend. so much for hope huh. oh wells, that explains the song choice for today 'same direction' by hoob. I love that song, and the video too. Lately i've been into rock music. the angry type, because thats what i am-angry & angsty. curses, this anger has to wear off because i'm taking it out on everything around me. til then, toodles.
twisted taste: water!
Mood music:same direction by Hoobastank
But i'm not ever going to know if i'm right or wrong
'cause we're all going in the same direction
And i'm not sure which way to go because all along
We've been going in the same direction
*shy that way
lyrical
oh god, its a blogging addiction! hehe.
this one's for you caine. though, (thank god) you'll never read it.
I've been cheated by you since I don't know when
So I made up my mind, it must come to an end
Look at me now, will I ever learn?
I don't know how but I suddenly lose control
There's a fire within my soul
Just one look and I can hear a bell ring
One more look and I forget everything, w-o-o-o-oh
Mamma mia, here I go again
My my, how can I resist you?
Mamma mia, does it show again?
My my, just how much I've missed you
Yes, I've been brokenhearted
Blue since the day we parted
Why, why did I ever let you go?
Mamma mia, now I really know,
My my, I could never let you go.
I've been angry and sad about things that you do
I can't count all the times that I've told you we're through
And when you go, when you slam the door
I think you know that you won't be away too long
You know that I'm not that strong.
Just one look and I can hear a bell ring
One more look and I forget everything, w-o-o-o-oh
Mamma mia, here I go again
My my, how can I resist you?
Mamma mia, does it show again?
My my, just how much I've missed you
Yes, I've been brokenhearted
Blue since the day we parted
Why, why did I ever let you go?
Mamma mia, even if I say
Bye bye, leave me now or nevermamma mia, it's a game we play
Bye bye doesn't mean forever
Mamma mia, here I go again
My my, how can I resist you?
Mamma mia, does it show again?
My my, just how much I've missed you
?
Yes, I've been brokenhearted
Blue since the day we parted
Why, why did I ever let you go
Mamma mia, now I really know
My my, I could never let you go
twisted taste: pineapple tarts (still)
Mood music: mamma mia by ABBA
*shy that way
Wednesday, December 01, 2004
i'm so brilliant
Oh god, i swear, i love myself so very very very much. hehe, I MADE PINEAPPLE TARTS! i swear, whoever lives with me next time is so lucky.hehe. oh wells, theyre really yummmyyy.promise. anyways, i better go. im beat!
twisted taste: pineapple tarts! (the ones i made)
Mood music: baby it's cold outside by some people.hehe
*shy that way
sense & sensibility
love is an ever fixed mark that looks on tempests and is never shaken
oh well, i had a funny mental debate this morning, while i was unconciously awake and asleep at the same time. is that even possible? It was about what i could never have in life and which i wanted more, out of the two i could never have. i realized that i wanted what was bad for me more than what was good for me. Again, does that even make sense?
i heart joe hahn.hehe
Twisted taste:crackers with herb cheese
Mood music:FRGT/10 by Linkin park, Alchemist, Chali 2na
*shy that way
have you ever been low?
3 posts in one day, that's quite alot. But since the others were just like 3 lines long, it's not counted as an addiction to blogging yet. I feel terrible and it's nothing new. I guess i'm much better than i was the last few days but it doesn't mean it doesn't hurt as much. oh wells, life goes on i always say and it's easier to deal than to mope. But it kinda sucks still. god, it shouldn't hurt so bad. It wasn't even like, a long-term problem. But maybe it was because i had too high hopes and you know, i should have learnt my lesson by now, its been what? 16 years in this world? but i guess i haven't, and as much as i know i always get let down in the end, be it by my friends or people around me, i never stop hoping and placing them on pedestals. That's what hurts the most, being disappointed time and time again. Do you think i'll get to afraid one day, i give up altogether? Sometimes i dont want to, because then the excitement i have for things *eg:prom) wears off and my life seems like an endless road of monotony, but can you blame me? I jsut try to prevent being hurt. I still get hurt anyway.
talk about failing miserably.
oh wells, i'm outie. see yous!
*shy that way
fresh beginnings
i've gotten a new blog mainly because the old one kinda screwed up and i got so fed up trying to fix it, i just gave up. so yeah, new blog! i like it, it's girly and classy chic, so yea. i'll write more later.seee yous!
*shy that way
